Advice: Prioritize Your Life!!

Ok, as crazy as Brittany Renner's Snapchat is, she made a really good point today. Long story short, she said that women place men too high on their priority list in life when they really shouldn't be that high. Yeaaahhhh I know most women's' goal is to get married, have children, and live a cookie cutter life. But let's be REALLY REAL here... these days that's not always how it goes. No longer are the times where women get married fresh out of high school/college, have kids a year or two later, get a house,  and are perfectly settled by 30. Some are lucky enough to find that but it's not today's true reality.

I'm not saying, go out and be a complete savage in your dating life, but stop planning your life around finding Prince Charming. Sometimes taking a step back to think about what you TRULY want in life is the best way to go. I'm doing this right now as I type. What does Dianna really want in life? This can be right now or in the long run but it's easier to think about things in the present and near future tense. I've been so caught up in thinking that having a guy by my side will set everything in motion and my life will be perfect. Unfortunately, I've dated a few different guys (which all failed) and the fact that remains is: I STILL HAVE TO GET MY OWN SHIT TOGETHER!!! I still have to accomplish my own goals and I still have to look out for my own best interest. I say all this because, a guy may come, stay, or go in your life but at the end of the day the things you want in life should not change. You should NEVER compromise the things you want for yourself because of other people.

Rant: Bitter Love

So yesterday I was in my feelings BIG TIME. I honestly don't even know what brought it on but somehow I'm sitting in my car and this wave of sadness washes over me. Why was I sad you ask? Because I'm still single. :(

I don't want to hear the perpetual "Put yourself out there more" or "You're not alone, a lot of people are single" or the worst one, "It will happen one day." SCREW ALL THAT CRAP! I know I'm being a little melodramatic but whatever.

MOST people that are in relationships, or easily acquire relationships, look at dating like a job. They act like you can just send your dating resume out there complete with a cover letter and references and BAM you're attracting dates like moths to a flame. But in reality it doesn't work that way and because it doesn't work that way you start questioning yourself.  Am I not smart enough? Am I not pretty enough? Am I indeed too shy? What's wrong with me??

This is exactly where I'm at now. Logically I know there's nothing truly wrong with me that would make dating and my nonexistent love life such a hassle but dating isn't something you can always look at logically. The truth is some people have certain qualities about them that make dating a breeze and some don't. If you are in the "don't" category then you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. Some people radiate this natural confidence, charm, and good vibes while other have to work on those qualities. 

Ok, in all honesty, I'm writing this because I feel stuck. I can blame it on Mother Nature that I wasn't born with magnetic charm or whatever but I know that's just silly. I understand that sometimes love just happens. You're in the right place at the right time with the right person and things just happen. I also understand that sometimes you meet someone and work at it until you fall in love with them. But none of that can be seen with 20/20 vision when you've been single for over a year and can't fathom the end being anytime soon. For a great portion of 2014 I tried really hard to improve my love life. In the beginning of 2014 I was kind of still dating this guy I'd been seeing for almost 2 years. However, that eventually fell off. I attempted an old flame... HUGE MISTAKE. I chilled on dating for awhile then tried to get back out there again. I went on a few dates which were ok but that's it. They were just "ok". It's a new year and I'm going to TRY to be optimistic and open to whatever comes my way but there's still a huge part of me that thinks I will be single for a vedddyy long time. 

Anyway... that's enough of that rant. :-/

2014 Reflection: 5 Hits & Misses

2014 is coming to a close and I think now is an excellent time to reflect on the good, the bad, and the ugly of the past 365 days. Lately, I've been reading my old diaries and realized this year was kind of a roller coaster for me. If you'd like to check out my 2013 hits and misses click [Here]. Without further ado, let's jump right into my 2014 hits & misses!! 

My 5 Hits

1. I finished my AA and start working on my BA in January!!!! :)
2. I was more adventurous (going on cruise, trying the painting class, archery)
3. I made a huge effort to be healthier yay!
4. Maintained a decent amount in my savings account
5. I was open to dating different types of guys 

My 5 Misses

1. I didn't move out like I had planned
2. I went through a 2 month long deep depression :(
3. Of course there were a few boy mistakes smh 
4. I didn't stick to a workout schedule at allllll 
5. I fell off with blogging towards the end of the year 

This year was def kinda crazy for me and I learned A LOTTTT about myself. I'm really going to use this reflection when I'm making my 2015 resolutions. Comment below with some of your 2014 hits and misses!! Love yaaaa :)

Shy Girl Dating Tips

To some women dating is a breeze but to others dating might be a battlefield you feel like you're just not prepared for. Guess what? Being a shy gal, I definitely relate to the latter of the two. I recently started dating again a few months ago after going through some malarkey with an ex. I recently met a really cool guy and in my opinion our first date was a FAIL. He was perfect but my shyness definitely got the best of me. I was so willing to throw in the towel and call a spade a spade. The date wasn't the greatest and I didn't blame him for losing interest. Buttt.....  PLOT TWIST - my friend convinced me to save face by being straight up with him and tell him sorry if I seemed shy and that my nerves got the best of me. He totally understood and is looking forward to our next date.

With all that being said, I wanted to share a few dating tips from one shy girl to another. Some of these are my own tips and some are tips I found from other sources. I hope these tips come in handy for your next date!

Suggest an active date instead of the clique dinner & movie 

Going bowling, to a painting class, or game center allows for you to get to know him without the interview-ish vibe. You'll actually have something to talk about other random questions back and forth. Plus it will let him know you're fun and can go with the flow. Both of you will be more relaxed and hopefully have a kick-ass time :)

Do your research before the date

I'm not saying be a stalker and check out every social media he has signed up for, but a quick glance at his Facebook likes won't hurt. Knowing a little bit about him before your date will help with conversation starters and allow for the conversation to keep flowing. Plus you'll already know what you have in common with him and possibly get extra brownie points for suggesting other things he might like. NOTE: just make sure you don't expose your creepin' ways! lol 

Two and done!

You might feel like a drink will relax your nerves. It probably will honestly. Just make sure you have no more than 2 drinks and I'm not talking about cup fulls of hard liquor either. You don't want to give off that alcoholic vibe when really you're just shy and want to loosen up. If you feel like you need a little bit of liquid courage order a glass of wine or margarita. You'll appear coooool but won't be a tipsy fool halfway into your date. 

Eat like a normal person!!

OMG ladies, I know none of us want anyone to see our true eating habits lol. I'm talking about both elbows on the table, sauce dripping down your chin madness but ordering a salad when you really want the pasta is just stoopidd! If you really want to eat it don't feel embarrassed. Odds are he will probably think you're ore weird for ordering lettuce with a side of air than just ordering what you want to eat. However, be cautious of sloppy foods. Chili cheese dogs and BBQ ribs might not be the best choice for the first few dates. Lastly, don't get a doggy bag afterwards. Carrying around a box of food for the remainder of the date = looking and feeling awkward. 

Be yourself!!

I tried to come off as someone I wasn't and ended up almost ruining the date. Just be yourself. If you are naturally quirky then be that! Nothing will kill the date more than not being yourself and feeling self conscious the entire time. If he really likes you he'll keep talking to you. If he doesn't then there are plenty of fish in the sea baby that would love to get to know the real you. 

Brush your shoulders off

As I mentioned above, there are wayyyy more guys out there that are willing to cherish you and give you the love you deserve. You might have to go through a few bad dates to get to them but just remember the problem is NOT you. Sometimes 2 people look great on paper but end up not having that much chemistry in person and that is OK! Just brush your shoulders off and get back out there. Being shy, it might seem easier to turn into yourself and give up but guess what honey? That ain't gonna solve your problems! You might just have to reevaluate how you're meeting your dates and maybe start going places you really love and chatting up the cutie doing the same :)

I really hope my tips can be of some help. I'm a shy girl trying to navigate this dating scene and it truly helps to have a few tricks up your sleeves. If any of you have dating tips/advice feel free to post them in the comments!!

Girl Talk: Advice to My Younger Self

Do you ever reflect on your life and say, "I wish I knew this and that when I was younger?" Sometimes I do. There are sooooo many things I wish I knew during my preteen and teenage years that would have saved me a lot of time and effort. Here is some of the advice I would tell my younger self if I had the chance ranging from boys to personal hygiene. Even though I can't go back in time to tell myself the things I've learned, I can only hope that this post helps any young ladies out there that do need a little advice to go by while battling those crazy teen years!

1. Life Goes On

When you're younger it's hard to see the end of things. You tend to feel like whatever you're dealing with is soooooo bad and soooo crazy that it couldn't possibly get better. That's why my first bit of advice to my younger self is life goes on and it WILL get better. The problems you're having today won't even matter a year from now. You failed a math test or your crush is dating someone else? Grab some ice cream, a chick flick, tissues, and cry it out. Then use those tissues to dry your eyes and move on because there are bigger and BETTER things to come.

2. Don't Rush Relationships 

I know, I know, I know... It seems like everyone is coupled up right now and you're the odd one out. But don't fret my little lambs your time will come. Some middle/high school relationships last a year, most only last a few weeks or months. Trust me you're not missing out on anything spectacular. Odds are your dates will be him AND HIS MOM picking you up in her minivan and dropping you off at the movies or the mall. Then you'll either be obsessing over him all day or feeling pressured to do things you think you're ready for but really not. Just relax and enjoy the freedom and drama-free life.

3. Don't Be Afraid To Experiment

Dye your hair funky colors, try new styles, join different clubs! Your teen years are the best years to find yourself and experiment with your different likes, dislikes, and interests. Trust me, once you get older you can't rock that nose ring or orangeish blueish pinkish hair without getting fired from your job or talked about. So enjoy it now and be free. However, PLEASEEEE do not experiment with things you do not feel comfortable with. Never feel like you have to do or try anything you don't want to.

4. Always Be Prepared

I definitely had my fair share of accident in middle school where simply being prepared would have helped me out sooo much! There are too many emergencies and surprises that love to pop up for us young ladies. Always carry around with you a mini deodorant, perfume, mints/gum, pads/tampons, tissues, pain killers, and lotion. You'll always be prepared for life's little gifts of joy (ughh) and you'll always have your friend's back if they aren't prepared.

5. Take Care of Yourself

Take care of yourself mentally and physically. Don't be afraid to talk to someone about your problems if they are really bringing you down. Some things are just to heavy for a person, especially at that age, to carry on their own. Make sure you're doing things that make you happy. Being in school sucks and can definitely get depressing or stressful at times but if you use your free time to do things you love it won't feel so cray cray. Also, make sure you take care of your body. Treat your body like a car that is getting you through life. Enjoy that high metabolism and energy while you can! 

6. Make Quality Friends

Great friends are the bommmmbbbb!! I know when you're young quantity seems more important than quality. You're trying to be friends with the in crowd but honestly, forget all that. As the years pass you will see people dropping like flies and your true friends will be the only ones standing. Take the time to build strong and genuine friendships with people because they are going to be the ones that get you through the tough times and enhance your crazy fun times!! 

7. Be Happy & Be YOU!

Be the BOSS!!

I think there are very few things better than being the boss of your own life. Sometimes it's hard to do that when you feel like you're constantly running around pleasing others and doing things for "the man." Every year I tell myself I'm doing to do this and that for myself but never do. Enough is enough. I'm taking control of my life because I want to ooze confidence and demand respect when I walk into a room. Plus it just feels good to know that you're doing something because you actually WANT to do it. Below I made up some helpful tips on how to take back your life and be daaaa BOSS! 

Stay In Control

• Treat your time as money - don't procrastinate when you have important things to do
• Keep your emotions in check - stay calm, cool, and think clearly in sticky situations
• Know/define your business and personal relationships - don't be the winy girlfriend or the annoying employee

Respect Yourself

• Be a good person - nobody likes a bossy asshole
• Say what you mean and mean what you say - stick to your guns to be taken seriously
• Cut out all the toxic people in your life - constant drama/negativity is not healthy

Get Organized

• Get your finances in order - can't be in control if you're stressing about money
• Clean up your living/work space - how you live is a reflection of how you think
• Make personal and business schedules - always know what is going on in your life

Maintain Yourself

• Make healthy choices - you won't be confident on the outside if you feel sloppy on the inside
• Take pride in your appearance - wear what gives you the most confidence & ROCK IT!!
• BE HAPPY - do what you love and remember to treat yourself when you need a pick-me-up

"The thing women have yet to learn is that nobody gives you power. You just take it."

~Roseanne Barr

Single Valentines

If you're like me, you're single for Valentine's Day. Before you get your tissues and sing about being so lonely, remember that being single on Valentines's Day DOES NOT have to suck. First, appreciate that you're stress free and drama free in the relationship realm of your life and also note that the lovey dovey couples you see walking around probably aren't as happy as they look. But if you decide to decapitate one of their stuffed bears... I won't blame you :) 

If you still decide to lock yourself in your room and watch sad movies all day then that's your business, but for the rest of us singles that actually want to celebrate the day... let's celebrate it in STYLEEEE!!! 

Single Valentine's To Do List 

1. Host or go to a party! (that's what I'm doing)
2. DIY dinner & movie date (order your favorite meal to go, pick up a movie, and chill)
3. Have a fake Valentine's date with one of your friends
4. Treat yourself to a spa day (massage, nails, etc)
5. Grab your single friends and go bowling or to a club
6. GO SHOPPING!!! 
7. Have a Girls' Night
8. Snuggle up with a cozy blanket & a good book :)
9. Celebrate with your family
10. TREAT IT LIKE ANY OTHER DAY BECAUSE IT AIN'T THAT SERIOUS :)

Happy Valentine's Day </3

Update: Love & Fitness

Let's talk about loveeee babbyyyy lol. Ok yeah in my Love Woes post I talked about this guy that I've been seeing for 2 years.. well honey buns, that is all over! Nothing crazy happened, he just really let me down and it finally hit me that I'm better than all that! Every woman deserves a guy that knows her worth and treats her right. Him letting me down was the final nail in the coffin. So I gave it a few days to really think about the situation and decided that I don't need that or him in my life anymore. If someone isn't putting as much into a relationship either friendly or romantic, it's time to pack your bags and MOVE ON! Yesterday I deleted his phone number, texts, etc out of my phone and thank goodness I didn't remember his phone number (makes it easier not to lonely text him). I can't say I'm not sad or secretly hoping he will pull this huge surprise out of his ass and show me he's serious, but I'm also realistic and know that won't happen so the best thing to do is just keep moving forward without him. Thankfully I have AMAZING friends including my bff Miya (Miyaloves.Blogspot.Com) who got me to come partay last night which made me feel so much better! Thanks girl!! <3

For my February Fitness Challenge update, I completed the challenge for 5 out of the first 8 days so far. It is getting easier to wake up and just do the little workout routine. I also add extra sets or new workouts to it if I'm really trying to feel the burn. Like I said in the post, this challenge is just a starting point to get my motivation up and to start actually WANTING to workout in my system. 

How is everyone else doing on their weight loss/health challenges? 

Unrequited Love

Oh love, love

What is thee

Just a bunch of words 

Spoken unto me

You make such promises

Of happiness to come

Yet you're the one thing people run from

How can I keep you

Even for a minute

I want to bask in your glow

To speak you and really mean it

Or hear your sweet name

Feel you wild and untamed

I want you to be the truth

To believe in your existence 

But I need some proof

Show yourself to me love

Show me that you're real

Fix me, fix me

My heart wants to be healed

 By Dianna <3

Love Woes

I truly dislike stubborn guys! I met this guy about 2 years ago that I really like. We "dated" for a while and now it's not as rock solid. The thing is, we really connect when we are together and I could definitely see myself with him for a while. There's only oneeeeee problem.... he doesn't want a girlfriend :( :( :( ughhhh! I understand his reason behind this craycray idea but it still sucks. For the most part he treats me like a girlfriend when I'm with him, he's a really great friend, he's helped me SO MUCH as a person, and I know he cares for me.. but I also know it's not enough. 

It's so hard to move on from someone that thus far has been really good to you and makes you feel special when you've never really felt special before. It's even harder to realize that someone else is going to reap the benefits you worked so hard to get. I really don't know what to do at this point because I know no time soon is he going to want to commit and there's no guarantee I'd be the one he chooses buuuttt... I really like him. I don't know how some chicks can so easily walk away from what they want when its not right. I guess I just need to be stronger and learn to let my brain lead and my heart follow. 

2013 Reflection: 5 Hits & Misses

As we enter the last days of 2013, I'd like to reflect on this past year. I don't know about you, but I feel like it went by so fast!!! Anyway, there were definitely some highs and lows to this year that I will never forget. Here's a list of 5 hits and 5 misses of my year <3

5 Hits :)

1. I maintained  3.5 in all of my classes (physics and anatomy ain't no joke!)
2. I went to the Bahamas over the Summer and had an amazing time 
3. I turned 21 and had the best birthday with my friends!!!!! :)
4. I started a new job and met some pretty cool people 
5. I got in touch with my creative side AND started this blog (which I now love!)

5 Misses :(

1. I was not as responsible with my money as I should have been
2. I made a few bad boy mistakes...ooops :-/
3. I let my anger get the best of me at times and had to deal with the consequences
4. I didn't complete all of my 2013 resolutions :( 
5. I kept my room a mess all year long!! (ughh)

I'd say overall I had a great year and hope to have an even better 2014! I plan to take all of my misses and turn them into New Year Resolutions (my next post) and try my hardest to stick to them. I hope you all have had an amazing year! 

What were some of your 2013 hits and misses? 

Love Where Art Thou?

Love, love, love. What is love? How do you even know when you've felt it? How do you know you're not just being stupid mistaking fear of loneliness or lust or whatever other emotion for love? Blahhhhhhhhh

What is a Relationship?

Is it just me or has our generations' view on relationships taken a sharrrrppp left? I understand its not like the 50s anymore with the wife in the kitchen and the husband working a 9-5 Monday - Friday. But dangg, these days you don't even know what's going on between two people. Honestly I don't even think people are in relationships anymore. If you're not completely single, you're married because "we're dating" can mean anything from "we actually want to be together" to "we mess around 3 days a week." SHEESH!

Who is to blame for all this relationship confusion? On one hand I could say men have started this fad called "no titles." Basically, you talk and act like you're in a relationship without any of the commitment. On the other hand, I could say women have accepted the "no titles" ordeal and have tricked themselves into thinking its okay to be someone's backup. But honestly, I truly blame it on people's fear of being alone, man or woman. Most people these days are so unhappy with themselves and look for anyone that will give them attentions, even if its negative. We jump from person to person to have something to do on boring Tuesday nights and we fool ourselves into thinking "this is better than being alone." But it's not! I use to be like that. Thinking if I had one guy to always run to when I'm feeling down and alone that I'd be happier. However, it didn't work out that way. I didn't realize that even though I initially agreed to this "no titles" bullshit, I'd eventually catch feelings for these guys and want more. They'd tell me no and I was stuck. Stuck because I let them have power over my feelings, because I was so unhappy alone. I'd let my heart believe it was a relationship even though my brain was screaming HELL NO!

Eventually I broke myself out of that and I now want a true, functional relationship. You first have to be content with being single and enjoy your own company. Once you can master that, you will be able to say no to these unhealthy no strings attached bullshit relations and won't settle for anything less than you deserve. It just sucks that not enough people realize this and continue no title relationships which makes it harder to actually meet someone that DOES want a serious relationship. ughh.. I'm rambling now.. lol bye :)